CrossFit® shoe (horror) stories: when love is not reciprocated

So they arrive the new CrossFit® shoes. Despite the ten thousand hours of browsing through the eCommerce, even though you have tried and tested them in the store before choosing the model and color, you are a little excited.

You are very excited.

You look at the box, I weigh it. Get comfortable on a flat bench (who doesn't have it in the living room?). Lift the lid. Tissue paper turns them into jewels of the highest quality, do you think you could use them to declare yourself to your girlfriend (who would still tell you something like I preferred them with a different frame).

In reality they are yours and only YOURS and you are very jealous, as always when it's love at first sight- especially since HIM also uses this model [insert the name of your favorite crossfitter here], and these two masterpieces of design and fluorescent colors bring you a little closer to him.

But the grim truth is another: love is not always reciprocated.

Let's say that luckily there is no betrayal: your shoes will be faithful to you… at least until unstitching or detachment will separate you.

But there are other problems that give life to real horror stories. I'll tell you four.

4 horror stories: protagonists, your CrossFit® shoes

The scent of (dis) love

Open your eyes that the alarm is ringing. You turn around, today there is no hurry, it is Saturday and in a moment the perception is clear to you I LEFT THE SHOES IN THE BAG BECAUSE I WENT IN THE HOUSE WITH STARS IN THE EYES AND EVERYTHING SHAKING CURSE THE BLAME OF THE DAMNED KIPPING PULL UP THEN THE BURPEES OVER THE BARBELL THEN I WAS ALSO ABOUT TO VOMIT BUT I HAPPENED BY LUCK YOU KNOW THAT THERE WAS ALSO THE NEW TYPE THAT IDEA WOULD HAVE MADE HOWEVER THE STARS IN THE EYES WHEN I ARRIVED HOME I WICKED A CENA TRAY OF ICE CREAM FROM A KILO AND FIVE HUNDRED AND I FALLEN DOWN ON THE SOFA NEVER TIME TO TURN NETFLIX ON THEN TO BED BUT WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE FOR ONCE I LEAVE THEM-

The fact is that bacteria are unforgiving. Have you ever forgotten the whey shaker used in the gym bag for a few days? Have you ever fallen back because you inadvertently smelled it? Here: if you don't treat them super well, your CrossFit® shoes risk to do this.

Okay, maybe it takes more than just one night in the bag… but the combo of sweat, wetness from the showers, the socks, the infamous effort of the WOD, the lack of ventilation, can literally work wonders (on the contrary).

These are skills that are learned in kindergarten

Eh, it seemed to you that you have fastened them well, not too tight because they cut off the circulation at your feet, in short: the right one. But it is that not too tight that has screwed you. At forty-seventh box jump you are tired, you can't take it anymore, your calves are on fire and your balance is unstable, you don't go down with momentum but you already bring your right hand first, and it happens: you are on top of the wooden box, a fluffy lace slips under the other shoe, move your leg back and down, and you are suddenly lying on your back, the only thing you see in front of you is an outstretched hand that wants to be grabbed.

- oly they know it well: shoes with velcro closure, and hello.

You were told that you only need shoes for the box ...

… And so you did. Always, God is your witness. Only that you are in a hurry today, you have just the time for your lunch break because at 14.15 pm there is a call, you have already changed shoes including and down a shakerone while you drive (don't forget it behind the seat), the parking lot is full in the garage, you have to leave the car two hundred meters away along the embankment, you almost run towards the entrance, you are out of breath even before starting - uff! - you pass the reception, enter the box, greet everyone and you realize that you did not immediately notice the faces just as you did not notice that the embankment is actually the dog area of ​​the whole neighborhood.

Splatter story: the important thing is that you haven't just eaten (I WARNED YOU)

Do you know why? Why did you tell yourself well, they don't have half the extra number that I would need to be comfortable, but do you want them not to soften a little, using them? No?

No.

So I'll explain something to you. You know certain jumping rope with the weights on the handles, that if you unscrew them you can take them off? Here: there are no weights inside. I'm like Rambo's cutlass, and inside is needle and thread.

*** STOP HERE IF YOU CAN'T BEAR THE STRONG DETAILS ***

So when the new ball shoes start to hurt you, steal a jumping rope and retreat behind a rack, because you will have to heal the blisters on your feet yourself.

Now. If you want a more literary description, you just have to ask me. But, in short (and then I close because I have dwelt): you heat the needle with a lighter, you pierce the bladder, you squeeze it, you remove the needle, you pass a piece of thread in the eye, you soak it in disinfectant, go over everything in the bladder hole a few times. 

Okay: go to eBay, sell the offending shoes, look for the extra half size.

: )

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